So often, we begin to think that being single is a bad thing. The world thinks that being single is “second class” to everyone else and deserves sympathy. But that isn’t true. God has given us so much to be thankful for, especially when we are single!
Being single is a full life. It is not empty; you don’t need sympathy and you aren’t “second class.” You shouldn’t pity yourself or receive pity from others. Being single gives us so much room for opportunity, time, and the ability to bless others. The single life is indeed not empty.
However, it can still feel empty sometimes. We find ourselves longing for a relationship and doubtful if we deserve one.
When you are doubtful that God will never give you a boyfriend or a husband, declare this over yourself!
“My life is full of Jesus and full of the Holy Spirit. I live a full life. My life is not empty. God has given me an abundant life.”
But how can living the single life be so abundant?
When you are single, there is so much freedom for other things. God gives you the ability to serve more, to give everything to Him and to do so much for His kingdom.
God is giving you this time of singleness for a reason, you might not be ready for a relationship, or maybe your future partner isn’t ready. God has not overlooked you. If God doesn’t have you in a relationship, it’s for a reason. He has greater plans for you right now, He isn’t finished with you yet. He’s still longing to dance with you, as your Father, He will let the right man cut in at the right part in the song.
While you’re single, don’t be afraid to love.
There is no fear in love.
“We love because He first loved us.” 1 John 4:19
Just because we aren’t loving a significant other, we should still be loving others around us just the way that Jesus did. We should show others love through our actions and our words.
Sometimes, we fear that being single is placed on who we are, instead of where we are. Your identity is not found in your singleness; it is found in Christ alone. Never compromise your integrity, character or your faith for a relationship.
It can be difficult to trust God with our relationships. We can be afraid that God won’t provide a significant other, or that it will take a million years. We are told by the world that being single comes with fears, but it doesn’t have to. Don’t let the fear of being single divide your allegiance with the Lord.
Fear leads to comparison. Faith leads to contentment with being single. When we are afraid, we can compare our lives to the lives of others. We compare ourselves to the newly wed high school sweethearts or the fake couples on TV. We get so caught up with who’s on The Bachelor and we forget that it’s all just an act. We long for that perfect relationship, but in reality, it’s not even achievable. When we keep our faith in the Lord, we will live with contentment in the time of singleness! He will show us how to live a content & abundant life through Him.
Fear leads to panic. Faith leads to patience. When we are afraid, it can put us into a panic in the sense that we aren’t with anyone or that we have the fear of being single for what feels like forever. When we keep our trust and faith in the Lord, it will lead to patience. God will give us the strength and patience to wait and trust that God is doing something amazing in our lives.
Fear leads to division. Faith leads to devotion. When we have fear, it can lead to division in our relationship with the Lord. We begin to live with a constant fear and we aren’t focused on God. If we keep our faith in Him, He will keep us fully devoted. Pray, read & seek Him in every situation.
Fear leads to paralysis. Faith leads to freedom. When we have so much fear, it will literally paralyze us from being able to love and to accept love. We will become so fearful of everything around us, more than just relationships. If we continue to keep putting our faith in the Lord, it will lead to freedom. Freedom from fear, doubt, comparison, panic, division, lust, jealousy and so much more. Freedom is going to church, giving everything to the Lord, serving and giving of your time, talents and treasures. God will continue to use you to further His kingdom! Now that is something to rejoice in!! You have so much freedom when you are single. It may take being single for you to realize the full potential God has for your life. God may want to show you how He wants to use you; you just have to put your heart in his hands and let go first.
Use this time to become the wife Jesus wants you to be.
God will use you in ways that only single people like you can be used. That doesn’t mean that he can’t use people that are in relationships too though. He has plans for each and every one of us. Remember, it’s all about His timing.
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11
Lead yourself before you lead others.
Love yourself before you love others.
Live fulfilled in the fullness of God.
When we are independent, we will learn to become fully dependent on Christ.
The more we fill ourselves with God’s life-giving love, the less we find ourselves dependent and dictated by our relationship status.